I want to be a pirate!

I am now completely over my obsession with pirates. It started around seventh grade, and peaked shortly thereafter with a passing crush on Guybrush Threepwood, who was cuter when he was pixelated. Monkey Island 4 should never have been made, it was so crappy. Anyway, I'm completely over it now, just in time for piracy to come into fashion. I saw at least five or six kids dressed as pirates on Halloween, and you can't even walk into a store without being slapped over the head with POTC2 merchandice. If I see another peechee folder with Orlando Bloom on it, heads might not roll, but they'll be a little bruised. He's ugly. I don't understand how girls get so obsessed with movie stars. Even the good-looking ones aren't worth that much of your time. I only ever saw one movie where I caught myself thinking "Hmm. He's kind of handsome." (Just so you know, it was King King. Not the monkey, the movie. Handsome Writer Man is handsome because he's not 'hot'.) The other day, I overheard a couple of middle school girls talking about how they're going to marry some famous person I'd never heard of, and only just stopped myself from smacking them over the head and reminding them that their "fiance" doesn't know they exist, which is a good thing, since I probably would have been kicked off the bus and had to walk home in the rain. I am firmly of the opinion that girls are silly and somewhat boring. There's no explaining how their brains work. The obsession with boys is unfathomable to me, which might explain my total inability to flirt. I didn't even know I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16 until I was 16 and a half. Not that it matters. I'm not bitter about my eternal singleness, but I'm definently bewildered by the concept. I don't know. I'd always kind of assumed one day something would happen in that area of my life, but it resoundingly hasn't. It's still better to be single forever than do something stupid, which I think is blindingly obvious, but apparently, most girls don't know that. I don't get it. Girls are silly. Oh wait...